


To Have Loved and Lost

by rumpledspinster



Category: ouat
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-12
Updated: 2015-06-12
Packaged: 2018-04-04 01:22:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,656
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4121164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rumpledspinster/pseuds/rumpledspinster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Adam Gold accepted David's challenge to pick up a girl at the local dance hall he never anticipated it would be his soulmate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Have Loved and Lost

**Author's Note:**

> This short fic is in response to a fluff turned angst prompt for a story where a couple is in the cold, one gives their coat to the other, and no one freezes to death. So where is the angst?  
> Read on to find out. Mwahaha!

What am I doing here? Adam Gold did not socialize, so why was he sitting alone at a romantically lit table for two at the local dance hall at 9 PM on Friday night? Oh yeah… It all came flooding back to Adam. Why did I make that stupid bet? After one too many drinks last Friday, somehow Adam had been suckered into a bet with his old friend David that he wouldn't be able to pick up a girl at the local dance hall. "I'll have you know that women find me incredibly charming!", he had boasted to David. 

To which David had replied, "then why haven't you been out on a date in over a decade?"

Adam jolted back to the present as his phone vibrated in his pocket. Of course… It was a text from David:  
So hav u met any1 yet?

 

Ugh. Adam sighed. He scanned the room, his eyes stopping on a radiantly beautiful young woman standing alone in the corner of the dance hall. She was gorgeous! She wore a pale gold dress with matching T strap shoes. She wore her chestnut hair with the top layer in an elegant bun adorned with a gold rose, and with the rest of her hair framing her lovely face in chestnut curls. And her eyes were the most gorgeous shade of blue Adam had ever seen. Adam couldn't help wondering why such an amazing girl was standing in a corner alone. He quickly texted David back:  
Just set eyes on the  
woman of my dreams. 

David quickly replied:  
But r u the man of   
hers ???

Adam looked at the text. Ugh...

Adam had decided he was going to approach his dream girl, but he needed to ensure he wouldn't have to deal with interruptions from David.  
He quickly texted back:  
Am about to wk my   
magic so...STFU!

David answered almost instantaneously:  
OK! But pic or it didn't   
happen 

Adam summoned all the courage he could muster and strode across the hall.   
"Umm...hi."

"Hello." She replied in a quiet voice with a slight Australian accent.

"Uhh... I noticed you from across the room, and I was wondering if you are waiting for someone?"  
(I must sound like a babbling idiot! Ugh!,) Adam silently berated himself.

"No. I'm not waiting for anyone… " She replied in a shy, slightly wavering voice. 

"Well, I have a reserved table for two... and it's just me here... so...would you like to join me?" (well that couldn't have sounded any more pathetic.)

"I would love to." She replied back with the most truthful face Adam had ever seen.

Adam led her to his table in absolute shock. She had said yes… Now what?

Adam pulled out a chair for her before taking his own seat.  
"My name is Adam by the way, and yours is?"

"It's Belle."

Belle… Adam couldn't think of a more perfect name for the ethereal creature sitting before him.

"What a lovely name."

Adam found that talking with Belle was effortless. She was smart, funny, and absolutely charming. It was the first time in more years than Adam could count that he felt like he was speaking to someone on his same level. Adam had never believed in stories of love at first sight or soulmates, but now he understood how those people felt. It was truly as if he and Belle were of one mind and one heart.  
They talked for hours, and when they ran out of words they danced as if they were the only two people in the world. Much too soon it was 2 a.m. And the dance hall was closing for the night. 

"May I see you again?" Adam felt his heart pause in anticipation of her answer. 

"I would like that very much." she replied, and Adam exhaled a breath he didn't know he had been holding.

"I'll meet you here, at the dance hall tomorrow night at 9 PM." She replied before she turned and began walking toward the exit.

"Wait!"  
Adam just remembered the final text from David. 

"Would you mind if I took a photo of the two of us before you go? To remember the night."

She turned back toward him.  
"Sure."

He held her close and took a picture. For some reason Belle looked strange in the picture, as if she was giving off light. Hmm. 

As he looked up from his phone he noticed that Belle was already at the door. She turned back in his direction. "May I have a copy of the picture?"

"Of course! I'll bring one with me tomorrow, I mean tonight because it's already tomorrow." (Could he sound any stupider?) as Adam walked home he still couldn't believe his luck. What on earth an angel like Belle saw in him he would never know, he just prayed that she didn't come to her senses.

Once home, Adam quickly got ready for bed. He printed a few copies of the picture, and placed them on his dresser. It then occurred to him that he had a silver picture frame sitting forgotten in a drawer, an unwanted present from years gone by that might now serve a purpose. He retrieved it and lovingly placed one of the pictures inside. He sat the picture frame on his nightstand, and fell asleep to pleasant memories of holding Belle close while they danced.

The next day couldn't be over fast enough. Adam was distracted all day with thoughts of Belle, but the day did finally come to a close as all days do and Adam hurriedly went to the dance hall to wait for Belle.

As 9 o'clock rolled around Adam was afraid that Belle might not show but then he glanced to the corner of the room, the same corner that he had first laid eyes on Belle the previous night, and there she was as beautiful as ever in the same golden dress.  
And just as they had the night previous, they quickly fell in to a comfortable conversation. They continued to share details of their lives and as the night began to wane they both felt as if they truly had known each other forever.  
Adam stood up and took Belle's hand leading her to the dance floor as the band begin to play the last song of the night. Adam held Belle close as they danced to Moonlight Serenade and in that moment he felt as if he had never been this happy before and perhaps might never be again. It was a perfect moment the kind that are over much too soon. 

When the time came to leave, Adam gave Belle a copy of the picture from last night. As she looked it over tears glistened in her eyes like diamonds.

"What's wrong?" Adam asked in a meek concerned voice.

"I wish I had met you earlier..." Her voice sounded sad but resigned. "Here." She handed Adam a plain white envelope with the words 'All my love' scrawled in elegant hand writing, and sealed with a kiss. "Take this, but don't open it yet. I should go, thank you ...for everything." Belle quickly made to leave. 

"Wait! I'll walk you home." Adam couldn't explain the feeling that had come over him. It was a consuming dread. He couldn't explain how, but somehow he knew it was important that he go with Belle.

"Oh. Um… Okay." Belle seemed unsure about Adam accompanying her out, but nevertheless she put out her hand to grasp his.

"Your hands are freezing!"  
Belle looked back at Adam with a pained expression. 

"I guess that means you have a warm heart. Here take my coat." Adam placed his coat around Belle's shoulders and she gave him a sad smile in return. 

They walked in awkward silence toward Belle's apartment for about a mile before Belle stopped and turned toward Adam. 

She placed a hand on Adam's cheek. "I need you to know that I love you with all my heart. And I am so sorry that we couldn't have more time together." She took the golden rose out of her hair and placed it in his hand. "Promise you won't follow me." She pleaded with him, a wild look in her eyes.   
Adam was terrified. What was going on? Was she trying to break up with him? That didn't make sense. 

"Promise me!" she shouted. 

"Belle… I ...I don't understand?"

But as the words came out of his mouth, Belle darted across the road toward the embankment disappearing halfway there. 

Adam cried out into the darkness, but no response came. He begged and pleaded with the darkness until he collapsed in the middle of the road, in the exact spot where Belle had disappeared.

Perhaps he was going crazy. Perhaps she never really existed? Maybe she was just a delusion conjured up by his lonely mind. But then he looked down at the golden rose hair comb in his palm. She was real, and she loved him. 

Adam nearly had a heart attack as his phone vibrated in his pocket. It was David. Adam answered in a shaky voice   
"Hey"

"Is Belle with you?"

"No… She's gone."

"Well...it's probably nothing. But the hospital has a Jane Doe that they haven't been able to identify. They just sent a picture over a couple of hours ago and I've been so busy I only just looked at it, and… Well, it kinda looks like the girl, Belle, in the picture you sent me."

"I'm on my way."

"Wait! Adam there's something you should know. The Jane Doe, she's dead."

Adam struggled to his feet and started running in the direction of the sheriff station.

David met him at the door. 

"Show me."

"Adam, you should calm down first."

"Show me!"

David handed Adam the picture the hospital had sent over. And Adam felt as if the world had crumbled around him. It was Belle.

"I have to see her."

"Adam, you don't want to see her as she is now in the hospital. Wait until they release her to the funeral home."

"I have to see her now David! Please." Tears streamed down Adam's face. David had never seen Adam this vulnerable. David nodded and drove Adam to the hospital. At the hospital David flashed his badge exchanged words with someone at the nurses' station, and before long they were heading towards the morgue. It was as if time was moving in slow motion, Adam felt as if his vision were blurred, like seeing things through a window smeared with grease. Then all of a sudden his vision was painfully clear, as the sheet covering a human shaped mound on a cold steel table was pulled back to reveal the pale lifeless body of 'his' Belle.   
No. This couldn't be happening. He had just seen her… this was impossible. 

"Adam… Do you know if there someone I can call? Does she have any family in town?"

"No. She doesn't have any living family."

"Well. I know you probably don't feel like talking right now, but I need to ask you some questions. When is the last time you saw Belle?"

"I was just with her. I was walking her home right before you called. I know it's going to sound crazy, but it's as if she just disappeared."

"Okay… Well the report I was given by the hospital states that her body was found off the embankment of highway 10 about three hours ago. But that it appears that she was struck by a hit-and-run driver probably around 8 PM yesterday evening. I just assumed that the doctors were off by a couple of hours since I know that she and you were together on Friday night, but there is just no way that you were with her tonight."

"David I'm telling you that we were together. Look she gave me this." He showed David the hair comb, "and this," Adam pulled out the forgotten envelope from his pants pocket.

"What's inside it?" David asked. 

Adam opened the envelope and glanced at the papers that were neatly folded inside. It was a last will and testament, the last will and testament of Miss Belle French leaving all of her worldly possessions to Mr. Adam Gold. 

"Well… This will make things considerably easier on my end anyway."

Adam was shocked. This was all too much, he didn't know what to think, he couldn't think. He was having an out of body experience, floating outside of his body his consciousness was unable to do anything but stare at the broken man he had become.

David returned with a box. When had he left? He placed it on a table near Adam.

"These are her personal effects, as her legal next of kin I'm releasing them to you."

Adam is still unable to speak. What are words? Did they still exist? What words can express the feelings?   
He felt as if his brain was short-circuiting.

The next thing he knew David was helping him walk inside his house. He sat him down at the kitchen table placing the box of Belle's things on the table, he placed a hand on Adam's shoulder and assured him that he would deal with the transfer of the body to the funeral home, but tomorrow Adam would need to make some decisions as to funeral arrangements.

Time passed. Adam wasn't sure if it had been minutes or hours. Only that the sun hadn't come up, and that it must be raining because he could hear the tip tip tip sound of the water on the windows.

He realized that he was clutching the envelope that had held Belle's will in his hand, the will having been taken by David. He looked down at Belle's words scrawled neatly on the front  
'All my love'. Adam lifted the lid off the box. Inside there was a Ziploc bag with what remained of Belle's beautiful gold dress, now muddied and smeared with blood, her T strap shoes also muddied and the strap on the right shoe was broken, a small golden clutch containing a compact; lipstick; a couple of tissues; a key presumably to her apartment; and the picture that he had given her; and there, at the bottom of the box, lay his coat neatly folded. He lifted it up and looked at it. It was just as clean as it had been when he had placed it around her shoulders, but it smelled like her… white tea and orange blossom honey. She couldn't have been wearing it when she was struck by the car. What had David said? That the doctors believed she had been killed at 8 PM on Friday, but that was a full hour before he met her. None of this made sense. But then a disturbing thought creeped into Adam's mind. Perhaps the doctors weren't mistaken about Belle's time of death, but that would mean that when Adam met her she was already... He couldn't bring himself to think the word.   
He had lost his soulmate. But he supposed, that if she really had died before they met, he should be thankful that for whatever reason the universe had decided to give him at least two perfect nights with her.   
Adam wasn't sure he could go on living without her, but then her last words came back to him.  
Promise you won't follow me.  
He hadn't understood their meaning at the time, but he did now. She didn't want him to throw his life away.

This is all too much. Adam was exhausted. He took the envelope and the hair comb and headed to bed. He placed the comb and the envelope alongside the silver picture frame on his bedside table. He collapsed onto the bed fully clothed and stared at the precious picture held within the silver frame until sleep finally took him.

**Author's Note:**

> This ficlet is inspired by the North American urban legend of Resurrection Mary.


End file.
